Bitching Brew

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Life-changing moments. Of a sort.

This is my hundredth post. I ought to have a black celebration. That I didn't keep up the initial frenzied pace (phew!).

I'm going to write about a few events, or moments, that I'd consider at least slightly life-changing. I'll try to skip the really obvious ones though.


3. The first time I walked into a bar on my own and chatted to a random woman. (I got two goes at this one - since this initial one was a false start!) I went into Doyle's near college to meet some friends and watch a football match. The friends hadn't arrived yet, and I noticed a woman, strawberry blonde, mid-20s, sitting at a table on her own and half-smiling at me. I plucked up the courage to go over and talk to her. She was receptive and loquacious... until about five sentences in, when it dawned on her that I wasn't the man she'd been waiting for. (Blind date, possibly?) Instead of reacting with humour, she passed from embarrassed to defensive to angry in the space of four seconds. Her wild shouts quickly drove my flushed self to the other side of the bar.

2. The first time consumerism completely nauseated me, literally as a bodily reaction. I was on the plane travelling to Berlin, and the crew came around trying to sell me water, snacks, etc. Nothing unusual there. But for some reason, the word 'purchase' stuck in my ear. As the trolley trundled down the aisle, each and every row were asked, in the same pleasant preppy pitch, "Would you like to purchase anything?" After listening to five or six repetitions, gradually getting louder and closer, I felt my ears and neck burning - I was going mad. Purchase, purchase, purchase! "NOOOO!", I wanted to scream! No, I don't want to purchase a can of Sprite! Or "purchase" anything! Ever! Again! There is something more - so much more - to my life than PURCHASING! AAAAAARGH! How I LOATHE that word!

I didn't scream of course. I leaned my head back and tightly closed my eyes, partly in an effort to sleep, until the tangerine-bodied corporatist soul-destroyers had passed me by. Then I took out my own bottle of water. And basked in a minute-long sip of lukewarm, unrefreshing but thirst-relieving water from the kitchen sink. It was glorious. Then I tried to sleep again.

I'm an economics major, by the way. :)

1. The first time you realise that you've stirred desire in another person. I don't mean simple attraction; I'm talking about raw, ragged, ravenous lust that runs to the core. It's a special moment when you see that in someone's eyes, just for you and caused by you. There and then, it wasn't exactly at the forefront of my mind (!), but I was definitely aware, on some level, that this was new. And awesome, in both senses of the word! Everyone learns at different times. I'm glad I wasn't 14 or 15 when it happened - I'd probably have been waaay too self-involved even to notice that the girl had feelings of her own.

Knowing that you have that power can be a beautiful thing - never is our interdependence so vivid. A dangerous thing also, but I've shied away from abusing it. Mainly because I'm still passively looking for another victim susceptible to my... charms. ;)

2 Comments:

  • Yeah, what gives with airlines charging for drinks and food?! It's not like we have any other option. It really, really bugs on me on long, 7 hour, flights.

    By Blogger C the Maven, at Sun Feb 26, 12:44:00 a.m.  

  • I don't mind paying for food on a shortish flight, given the cheap airfares, but the least they could do is offer free water. That really bugs me. As well as the inflight tat they try to flog.

    By Blogger Martin, at Tue Feb 28, 10:33:00 a.m.  

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