Bitching Brew

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Another amusing tale emanates from Pennsylvania Avenue.

Happy holidays! Unfortunately, words similar to this have landed none other than George W. Bush in hot water with the religious right. Apparently, the cards he sent out this year weren't Christian enough. This is despite the fact that (a) they're no less Christian than those from any recent year, and (b) they include a verse from the Bible. But hey, that's not good enough for some people! Maybe an extended Passion of the Christ DVD would mollify 'em. Or they could just helpfully nail their own tongues to their tonsils. Go moan about something of the remotest relevance; spare us the whinging.

The only reason this has become an issue is that a bunch of motivated nut-jobs are creating hysteria out of a few minor (but silly) incidents by alleging a 'War on Christmas'. This joins the interminable list of modern-day wars. Let's see, we have a never-ending 'War on Terror', a 'War in Iraq' (not 'on Iraq' anymore), a futile, wasteful 'War on Drugs', a 'War on Poverty' and a 'War on AIDS' (not really priorities), and now a 'War on Christmas'. Not to mention a couple of (unofficial) Cold Wars, e.g. the War on Nipples. Chilly February air, for example, has substantial effects on nipple condition. A fact underappreciated by the salivating mob.

No doubt, we will soon hear about 'The War on Jesus', which will surely stir up some trouble.

Anyway, a couple of amusing quotes. First up:

Bush "claims to be a born-again, evangelical Christian. But he sure doesn't act like one," said Joseph Farah, editor of the conservative Web site "I threw out my White House card as soon as I got it."

Maybe I'm unique in sniggering at that particular pettiness. The next one, however, is guaranteed to raise a smile:

This month, as in every December since he took office, President Bush sent out cards with a generic end-of-the-year message, wishing 1.4 million of his close friends and supporters a happy "holiday season."

I love the way they put 'close friends' in. I mean, they're such a healthy portion of the 1.4 million.

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